Courage

Do you know the kind of courage it takes to reach out when you are in need?

Have you seen the heart of someone who feels completely judged by the world around her, yet turns to you with her shattered heart, trusting you with answers?

Do you know the desperation that leads to this act of trust? After something like rape, it isn't easy to achieve.


The weight of having to bear her sorrows, the flashbacks triggered by her descriptions of trauma, the impossible pain and frustration of knowing that someone else in this world is suffering through such a lonely and excruciating place is heart-breaking. But I will do this. I can't not. How do you turn away such a painstakingly lovely request?

I don't know how to fix it. I can't make it go away. I want to, deeply and with an impassioned soul, I want to. All I can do, is offer my memories, offer my pain, offer the advice given to me.

"Tell me there will be a day where I wont feel like a shell anymore?"

"There will be. I can't promise you a day, a month, or a year, but there will be."

"Its been so long, I should be over this by now."

"No. Don't say that to yourself. You are not on anyone's time line but your own. 'Everything you do is Normal'. Don't rush yourself, don't discount what you're feeling now. You are fine just where you are"


Everything. Everything I do is normal.

-Do I believe this? I'm so tired of what I'm doing. Floating. Not committing. Not getting things done. Can I tell her these things when I don't know if I even believe them?

Everything I do is normal.


Then why do we feel like such outcasts?